You can put this on the DevEx support forum, but it won't help you any. This has nothing to do with the grid other than the fact that the field is being evaluated on a Dispose.
I know that you don't get what I am telling you, and Greg has tried to tell you the very same thing that I have been trying to tell you.
So let's start over. You have asked for help, you created a sample that reproduced the problem. I downloaded the sample that you gave and reproduced the problem on the version 8.1 grid. I showed you an example of how to resolve the error by trying to make you understand that if you are going to create a custom property that relies on an underlying column pulled back from a query...that column must exist in the result set!!!
For example, you can't create a custom property that attempts to pull from the CurrentRow if that column isn't within the CurrentDataTable.
You are welcome to post another sample if your first sample did not accurately depict your problem, which at this point it apparently did not since I corrected it and reposted it and you are still not pleased with the results.
If you do not supply "surgical precision-type" help, then you need to supply "surgical precision-type" details, otherwise we cannot help.
We have tried for a week now to help you with this problem and have gotten nowhere other than some frustrated and caustic remarks. So let's take the emotion out of the equation and start over....by starting with a sample that accurately depicts your problem. Past that, the bantering back and forth has not gotten anywhere and we are a week into the problem with no resolution....though I and Greg both seem to understand your problem, we cannot seem to make you understand the underlying issue. So at this point, let's go back to the sample, create one that shows exactly what you are trying to do since you did not like my previous answer, I will correct it and repost it.
Thanks.